“Act Like You Know Better” | Ephesians 4:25-5:2
I think in an effort to get through my sermon as quick as possible last Sunday I failed to mention that we will spend the entire month of August in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. I believe that when I was planning out these messages and I titled today’s I had a Deja vu moment remembering what my mom said to me every time I left the house, “Act like you know better.”
There’s an old, old story about a cantankerous, crabby old man. His neighbors avoided him. His four boys moved away from home as soon as they could. You get the picture. His poor wife stood by him, but it wasn’t easy. One night he went to bed and just slipped away.
His four boys were called in. What should they do? “He was hard to live around,” one of them said, “and no one could get along with him, but he was our Pa. We owe him a decent burial, out in the meadow beyond the field.”
So, they went out to the barn and found some boards and made a casket. They put the box on their shoulders and carried it past the barn. As they passed through the gate, one of the boys bumped into the post and this caused them to drop the box. The casket broke open and the cantankerous, crabby old man sat straight up. He was alive! He had only been in a very deep sleep!
Well, life got back to normal. He lived two more years, just as ornery and mean, cantankerous and crabby as ever. The boys could go back to their homes, but his poor wife had to stay and put up with him. Then one night he went to bed and just slipped away…this time for good.
His four boys were called in. What should they do now? “Well,” said one of them, “he was hard to live around, and no one could get along with him, but he was our Pa. We owe him a decent burial, out in the meadow beyond the field.”
So, they went out to the barn and found some boards and made a casket and put the old man in it. They put the box on their shoulders and started out of the house. And as they did, their mother—the old man’s wife—said sternly, “Boys, when you get out by the barn—BE CAREFUL GOING THROUGH THAT GATE.”
Maybe that cantankerous, crabby old man should have read our lesson for today! We probably all know someone who would fit this bill and I’m sure if you ask my family, they’ll tell you that it’s me.
A few years ago, around this time of the year, I was sitting in the surgery waiting room at a hospital somewhere, trying to read a book, but out of the corner of my eye I was watching the Olympics which were being shown on the television just above where I was sitting. The event which caught my eye was a water polo match between the United States and Croatia.
At first glance, and from a panoramic view, water polo looks like an easy sport. Don’t we all enjoy throwing the ball around the pool? But then they showed an underwater shot and its then that you realize the pool is about seven or eight feet deep and the players aren’t simply standing in the pool—they are treading water the whole time—added to that the fact that in between possessions of the ball they are also swimming the length of the pool between the two goals. Not only would I struggle with the treading water part, but it would take me most of the time of the game just to get from one end of the pool to the other.
Our life as a Christian is a constant battle very similar to what I was watching on the screen and it’s probably safe to say that we all go through periods where we just want to chuck it all in. It’s obvious that we live in a broken world, and we struggle with the demonic forces that are all around us. Being a true Christian is not for the faint hearted—always has been and always will be.
Think about some of the great figures from our Scriptures—folks like Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, and even David, the man after God’s own heart. There were times when they must have said, “Okay God, you’ve called me to this, and I’ve been obedient. When are we going to get to the good part?”
Yes, from the stance of a casual observer the game of water polo may look easy. From the stance of a casual observer being a Christian may look easy—but for those of us who are we know different don’t we? We know we face a daily battle—we know bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people—but we also know that the reward—the good stuff that we are promised will come and come abundantly when we stay strong and continue to grow in the knowledge and grace of Jesus Christ and by so doing become mature Christians.
In our text Paul is instructing individuals on how to continue on their faith journey—to get rid of all their feelings of hostility—to be kind, compassionate and forgiving. Most of us will agree that it is easier said than done. But somehow Paul managed to do it. If anybody had good reason to be angry it was Paul. He was writing from prison, a fate he did not deserve. He could have been bitter toward those who put him there. He could have been equally bitter toward those in the church that were constantly criticizing him—slandering him—and making all kinds of unjust accusations against him.
Saul of Tarsus would have fought back at those who persecuted him like this. Remember, he had been a fire-breathing reactionary at one time in his life—punishing people who did not conform to what he believed was the true religion. But when Jesus came into his life he was changed. As Paul, he was able to return hatred with love—anger with gentleness—and slander with words of kindness.
Paul begins our lesson this morning with one of his favorite words, “Therefore.” In fact, in our nine verses this morning he uses it twice. I’ve always been told that when you see the word “therefore” you need to discover what it is there—for.
To do that this morning lets, as we often must do to understand Scripture, read backwards just a bit. “You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24 NIV).
[My first word/last word for this year: 2 Corinthians 5:17]
The first thing Paul mentions is speaking truthfully. Lying disrupts unity by creating conflicts and destroying trust. It tears down relationships and leads to open warfare in the church.
Who are we to stop lying to? Our neighbors, for we are all members of one body. And we remember how Jesus answered the question, “Who is my neighbor?”
The Bible doesn’t tell us that we shouldn’t feel angry, but it tells us to handle our anger properly, so it doesn’t control us. If vented thoughtlessly, anger can hurt others and destroy relationships. If bottled up inside, it can cause us to become bitter and destroy us from within. Paul tells us to deal with our anger immediately in a way that builds relationships rather than destroying them.
Honest labor is set over against theft. Respect for the rights of the personal property of others is a valid and unchanging Christian ethical principle. Honest labor is a certain antidote against the dishonest acquisition of property at the expense of others.
Right thinking and right speaking are essential to the Christian life if God’s Holy Spirit is to be reverenced and honored and the Body of Christ that consists in Him is to be kept intact. To grieve a fellow Christian or cause them to stumble is to grieve the Holy Spirit and endanger His seal in that believer’s life.
As Christians we must deny and avoid all bitterness—rage and anger—brawling and slander—and malice. These are characteristics and practices that have no place in the Christian life, the allowance of which is certain to disrupt and destroy the Church of Christ.
And finally, forgiveness. God forgives us, not because we forgive others, but solely because of His great mercy. Those who are unwilling to forgive have not become one with Christ, who was willing to forgive even those who crucified Him. Because Jesus forgave us, our forgiving attitude towards others should stand out in striking contrast to the unforgiving spirit shown by most of the world.
Just as children imitate their parents, we should imitate God. We do that by modeling our lives after Jesus, who, as the Son of God, was the incarnation of God on earth. His great love for us led Him to sacrifice Himself so that we might live. Our love for others should be of the same kind—a love that goes beyond affection to self-sacrificing service in the form of Agape (God’s) love.
A pastor friend of mine shared a story about a couple who were members of his church. The wife was diagnosed with a debilitating disease and to care for her the husband took an early retirement—sold their family home—and moved away to a community closer to her doctors and treatment centers.
My friend called and set up a time that he could come and visit with them. When he arrived, the husband was upstairs tending to his wife and called down for him to come into the house. As he stood there, he watched the husband—with great care and concern—carry his wife down the stairs after he had done her hair and gotten her dressed.
They sat at the dining room table—enjoyed coffee and muffins—and had a wonderful time-sharing old memories and generally catching up. As my friend left, he got in his car and started to drive away—but not getting very far he couldn’t help but to pullover and think about what he had just been a part of [I’ve had a few of those experiences—sometimes not able to get away from a home or the hospital without falling apart]. Seeing that man carry his wife down the stairs after brushing her hair—putting on her make-up—and getting her dressed, he realized that he had just witnessed true love up close and personal.
“We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19). God loves us beyond measure. Love is one of those words we can tend to just throw around. It can get watered down if we aren’t careful. We can catch ourselves saying things such as, “I love Diet Coke,” or “I love College Football.” Maybe we don’t understand the term because of the way we use it.
You probably grew up singing that song, “Jesus loves me this I know.” Did you believe it? Did you ever spend some time considering it? One of the first things I noticed when I moved to the south was folks ending their conversations and phone calls with, “Love you.” Not sure what that says about those of us who grew up in the north.
I don’t think we will ever be able to understand just how much God loves us. He doesn’t love you because of your looks or your abilities—because you are funny or just fun to be around. God loves you because He loves you. Nuff said! He gave us His only Son—who died on a Cross so that we might be redeemed—now that is love my friends! Just as the man in my story carried his wife down the stairs Jesus carries us through our trials and tribulations. “Follow God’s example,” this was Paul’s charge to the Ephesians and it’s our charge as well (lose the bad things and be the good things). In the broken world in which we live we are to reveal the love of God—through our words—our work—and through our very lives. It won’t be easy—it will be a daily struggle—but the results will be the good stuff that God has promised us!
Thanks be to God!
Eastman First Methodist Church 